Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Twenty questions ... plus twenty more questions

Here are some actual conversations I've had with Boogie during the past few days. I think I need to go back to school to find the answers.

Boogie: Mom [yes, she calls me mom instead of mommy ... what is she, 12?], is Dak a boy or a girl?
Me: He's a boy.
Boogie: Why do we have boys?
Me: Good question!

Boogie: Mom, what does "why" mean?
Me: Let's see, why means that you wonder why someone does something. Oh, wait, that doesn't work [me thinking and finally coming up with what I think is a brilliant answer). It means you're questioning the reason that someone does something.
Boogie: What does "reason" mean?
Me: Reason is why you do something. [and the cycle continues]

Boogie: Mom, did you take my fish to the doctor? [I accidently killed these little goldfish she had about 6 months ago, and told her that I had to take them to the doctor because they got sick].
Me: Yes.
Boogie: Why did you take them to the doctor?
Me: Because they were really sick.
Boogie: What did the doctor say?
Me: Well, he said they didn't make it.
Boogie: What does "didn't make it" mean?
Me: Well, it means they died.
Boogie: What happens when you die?
Me: You go to heaven.
Boogie: What's "heaven."
Me: That's where God lives.
Boogie: Does God sleep next to you when you're asleep?
Me: He watches over when you sleep.
Boogie: And then he wakes in the morning and his mommy helps him get dressed?
Me: Yeah, something like that.

Boogie: Mom, tell me about reasons.
Me: Well, the reason you hug someone is because you love them.
Boogie: And what else?
Me: Well, the reason you're disrespectful to someone is because you don't like them.
Boogie: What's "don't like"?
Me: It means you don't want to be around someone.
Boogie: What's "be around"?
Me: It means you don't want to see them.
Boogie: What's "don't want to see someone"?
Me: Boogie, you know what seeing someone means. Please stop asking questions.

Boogie: Mom, what does "reason" mean?
Me: It's means why you do something.
Boogie: What does "why" mean?

Secret Agent Josephine saves the day

Last Thursday, we found out that our daycare provider's last day for the year was last Friday. She works teachers hours, so she has the summers off. But for some reason, we thought her last day was this Friday, because that's when my husband is off. Apparently, all the other mothers in her daycare work for a different school district, and their last day was last Friday. So we had to scramble to find someone to watch Boogie and Dak this week.

I took off Monday, today, and half-day on Friday. Since it's my husband's last week, and because he's a sixth-grade teacher whose kids have a lot of ceremonies, etc., he couldn't really take time off until Friday. He had to participate in all of the events, which didn't leave time to be home with the kids.

My mother-in-law was able to watch them on Thursday (well, just Dak ... Boogie is in pre-school on Tuesdays and Thursdays). So that left yesterday to fill. Thankfully, Secret Agent Josephine saved the day!

One of the things I love about Jo is that time is as important to her as it is to me. If I say I'm going to be somewhere at 9:30, I'm there at 9:30. A lot of my friends are not that way. They arrive a half hour, an hour, even two hours late. It's so annoying, and rude to be honest. Why is their time more important than mine?

Anyway, Jo is like me. We had even planned to have lunch on Monday, so she could meet Dak and get a feel for his personality. At 9:30 on Monday morning, she called to say she probably wouldn't be able to make it for lunch. That was so refreshing. I'm used to being called at noon to say, "Oh, I'm running late and can't do lunch." Meanwhile, I've planned my day around that lunch, and now am starving, having to figure out what else to do. Even though I was bummed that I wouldn't see her, I was still able to plan the rest of my day early.

Jo arrived bright at early at 7 a.m., just when she said she would. She helped feed Dak as I got Boogie ready for her first day of pre-school. I had all the instructions on when to feed Dak, when he slept, things he liked to do. Even though she was nervous, she made me feel comfortable that Dak was in good hands.

I took Boogie to pre-school. She was so excited. We picked out her bed in the sleeping room, she met her teacher, and she met a new boy named Alex who she began playing with. Even though "he's not sharing," they seemed to be OK. I was able to give her a hug and kiss, and leave with no breakdowns or tears, neither hers nor mine.

I called Jo right before I was headed off to an off-site meeting around 11 yesterday, and things seemed to be running smoothly. Unfortunately, I didn't bring her number with me when I went to the meeting, so I wasn't able to reach her for the rest of the day. When I finally reached her at the end of the day, she was a little worried that she didn't do things right. She'd misread my note that said he usually sleeps from 8:30 or 9 a.m. to 10 a.m., and thought I said he sleeps from 8:30 to 9:10. Boy, I sure would be a stickler about time if I meant that. So she woke him up at 9:15, and for the rest of the day, he only slept for half-hour increments. Maybe he thought she was a stickler for time too!

When I came home, Dak was napping peacefully, and Jo wasn't too frazzled, at least she didn't look like it. He woke up and immediately started smiling, which showed what a great mom she's going to be. She really was a life-saver yesterday. Even though she felt like she needed more practice, I think she did a great job.

And even better, when I went to pick up Boogie from pre-school, she was excited to see me, but was also excited to tell me about her day. That she got to go on the Elmo potty, that she had fish sticks and green beans for lunch, that she got to play on toys on the play ground. I think she must have learned a little about God, too, because this morning, she said she couldn't get dressed until God woke up. I'm not sure what that meant, but about an hour later, she announced that God was awake, and she went and got dressed by herself!

Monday, June 20, 2005

Letting go

Little Boogie will be starting pre-school tomorrow. I'm so worried.

At her daycare this past year, Boogie was the oldest one there. She pretty much ruled the roost. She'd been going there so long, it was like her second home (the day care was in someone's house, so it was pretty much like being at home.)

But now she's old enough to start pre-school, where she'll be with kids her own age. What if they don't like her? What if she doesn't like them? What if she misses the comfort she had at daycare?

I know that she'll be challenged and intellectually stimulated, which I want for her. Her mind is so sharp, and she's always learning, and curious about the world. I know this will be good for her.

But I worry about her socially. Will she be scared to go into the restrooms by herself? Will she be sad when I leave her tomorrow morning? Will she like her teacher?

I know she'll be fine. The teacher even sent her a postcard telling her how excited she was to have her in her class. I know that she'll thrive. I just need to get through the first few days, when she's adjusting.

Boogie isn't extremely shy, but it does take her a while to get used to situations. The other day, we went to our neighbor's house for a party. Some kids about 10 years old were swimming in the pool. We asked Boogie if she wanted to swim and she said no. She just wanted to put her feet in the pool. About an hour later, she was ready to swim, and had the time of her life with the kids.

So do I wait an hour at preschool? Do I leave with out a second look back? This is all new to me. My mom was always of the thought that we needed to be independent in this world. At the age of six, she walked me to the bus stop at my new school (in the middle of the year), and said to just wait with the rest of the kids who I didn't know, and the bus would be along shortly. Then she went home. I kind of wish she'd waited with me that first day, especially because the bus did come, but passed us by. As I raced after it, I realized that the bus was stopping further down the road for some high school kids. They laughed at me running toward the bus. And then I had to go back to the elementary kids, who were laughing as well. I was mortified.

I don't want Boogie to feel that way. Any suggestions?