Friday, March 28, 2003

I'm actually doing my Friday Five's on time this week! Amazing!

1. What was your most memorable moment from the last week?
Wow, last week seems so far away. What did I do last week? I guess the thing I did differently that week versus most is that I worked on a freelance project where I had to create a survey along with funny descriptions for a portal launch at my old company. It was a very different writing job than traditional product sheets or company information documents. I could actually be creative and had a fun time doing it.

2. What one person touched your life this week?
A friend of mine from book club. She told me Wednesday that she's pregnant. She and her husband have been trying for quite a while, and she had a miscarriage last year. Today she told me that the couldn't find the heart beat, that she had to go to the doctor this afternoon, and that it might be another miscarriage. I'm just wishing for good things for her. The strange thing is we've never really been close friends. I know her from book club and we talk once a month, but this week she told me that I'm one of her favorite people at book club and she felt like sharing the news with me. I was honored that she chose to share such an intimate part of her life with me, and I want to be there for her if she needs it.

3. How have you helped someone this week?
While it's not a big thing, I stood up for my sister-in-law this week. She's not the type to complain about things, and even if she vents to me that's as far as it goes. At our gym, things have been getting really crowded where it's hard to take classes or get equipment. That wouldn't be so bad, but she's been having trouble with the staff as well. She referred me to the gym, along with her sister, and was supposed to receive some nice free gifts. When she asked about them, she just got the runaround, saying that they didn't have them in stock or that they gave it to her sister. Then, I got in the mail some free certificates to use for spa services and personal trainer sessions at the gym. I called her to see if she wanted to make appointments together, and she had never gotten any certificates. And she's the one who raved about the gym to me, so she should have at least received those "valued member" certificates. So I called the management and explained the situation and they promised to send her all of her promised gifts, as well as the certificates. I told her about it and she said it was the nicest thing anyone had done for her this week. So I guess that means I helped her.

4. What one thing do you need to get done by this time next week?
I need to do some sewing on my youngest sister-in-law's pants. She gave them to me a few weeks ago to sew. They have these slits on the side that she wanted closed up to make normal pant legs. I got as far as taking out the seams from the slits, but I've been lazy about getting out the sewing machine to fix them. Hopefully I'll get that done today.

5. What one thing will you do over the next seven days to make your world a better place?
Try to be a little more attentive to my husband. We just get so caught up in our lives of watching our daughter, studying for his classes, searching for jobs, etc., that we tend to do our own thing by ourselves too much. Then at night, we get caught up in our reality TV shows, and while we're watching them together, it doesn't lend itself to good conversation or just a nearness. I need to get better at that.

Thursday, March 27, 2003

I had a job interview today. I have no idea how it went.

I hate not knowing. I mean, I feel like I did pretty well. I made the interviewer, a VP in human resources, laugh, which to me is a good sign. She said she was impressed with my work experience, which also seems positive. She did say she wasn't sure about my management experience. That the only experience I've had is working long distance, with my group in Florida and me in California. I tend to think that it's harder to manage far away, and that if I had the group near me, it would be easier. But they may have their own ideas.

But the job seems really good for me. I think it will be challenging, managing a group of creatives that have their own ideas about how they want to manage. I'd get to write more, but also expand on my management skills. It would be good money with good benefits. And it's only 25 minutes from my house. All very good things.

I just hate the waiting game on whether I'll get called back for a second interview with my would-be boss. It's like I don't want to get my hopes up, but inevitably I do. Then if I don't get the call, it will be another blow to my self-esteem, that people don't think I'm good enough.

My husband has been very encouraging, reassuring me that we'll be OK if I don't get this job, that it's not the end of the world. But when a good job like this comes up, it's hard not to really want it. I'm ready for a challenge, to do something that will really make me work my mind. After months of, shall I say, mindless work, it would be a refreshing change.

So I'll just wait and see. At least she gave me a timeframe of the end of next week. So if I don't hear anything by then, I know I wasn't the right fit. I just hope that doesn't happen.

Tuesday, March 25, 2003

Why is it that you can feel so happy and content one day and feel the complete opposite the next? Today, I woke up grouchy, remained grouchy over breakfast and lunch and am still grouchy. I must be grouchy if I can admit that to myself. Usually if my husband says I'm grouchy, I come up with many reasons and excuses about either why I'm not grouchy or why he caused me to be that way. But today, I have no excuse. I'm just grouchy (how many times can I say that in a single paragraph?).

I just feel like I want to be alone. I'd like to read a book with no one to bother me. I'd like to take a nap. I'd like to sit quietly and meditate about why I'm in a bad mood. I honestly have no idea.

I should be happy. I have a job interview on Thursday. This is only my second one since I got laid off, but the job seems like it's custom-made for me. Hopefully I'll come across OK in the interview. Hopefully I'll be prepared enough and will have what they're looking for. I just think it's a good sign that they even called me and asked me to come in.

And the day is so beautiful. Mid-70s with lots of blue sky and sunshine. So why the glum mood on such a bright day? How do I get out of this funk?

We're going to dinner tonight with some good friends of our who are moving to San Francisco in a few weeks. I'm really excited for them because the husband was laid off about the same time I was, and he got a job in the place he's wanted to move back to for quite a while. He and his terrific wife of 6 months are finally going on their honeymoon next week. They're going to Hawaii. It's an interesting story because the first time they were going to go was the day after Sept. 11. So obviously the trip was postponed. Then they were going to go after their wedding last October, but he found out he had thyroid cancer a few months before that, so they had to postpone the trip until after his treatments. His treatments were successful and he's been doing great for the past few months. So they're finally going on their honeymoon. And then they'll be heading off to greener pastures (well, I don't know if they're greener ... maybe foggier pastures, colder pastures, more northern pastures.). I'll miss them. He's my karaoke brother. Last time we sang, "Word Up" by Cameo and really had the crowd cheering for us.

So hopefully dinner will get me in a better mood. I feel better just thinking about hanging out with them tonight. We talked about going to the bowling alley and singing karaoke for old times' sake. But I don't think Tuesday nights are big karaoke nights. We'll just have to break out an accapella (sp?) version of K.C. and the Sunshine Band's "Don't Go" at dinner.

I think I've just discovered that writing about being grouchy actually has a soothing effect that has made me a little less so. Something to remember.

Monday, March 24, 2003

It's amazing how a little Spring cleaning can lift your spirits. As I sit here with blisters on my hands, I also feel a little happier than I've been in a while.

All I did was remove the weeds from the cracks in the sidewalk and around our patio and do some major sweeping in the front and the back, but what a difference. You would think that rain would clean things away. All it does is scatter bits of dust and mud that then settle unnoticed on the concrete. Until you go to sweep and realize what the true color of concrete is supposed to be. We have quite a bit of concrete on our patio and some major brickwork beyond that, which is a challenge to clean because dirt gets stuck in the grooves. Needless to say, it took me quite a bit of time. Hence, the blisters. Of course, the blisters are also due to the fact that I never use gardening gloves and some of those weeds can be pretty rowdy. I just feel like I get a better handle on them if I use my bare hands.

Anyway, I also wiped down all of our patio furniture that had been covered for the winter, and then I finished cleaning our laundry room, which looks so nice and bright since we redid it. It's now a bright sunny yellow with a blue ceiling and white puffy clouds. A little clothesline border adds to the feeling that you're outside. Well, not really, but it is nice and bright and more fun to be in than it was before.

So now I feel content. I love the feeling of being tired after doing physical work. And of course, looking outside of my back sliding door and seeing a beautiful clean patio. Maybe now that it's Spring, my life will take a whole new turn. I can't wait to see what's in store for me.